Discovering Myself

“God put that dream in your heart for a reason”

If someone had told me years ago that I would travel and live in a foreign country, I wouldn’t have believed it. Seven years later, here I am in South Korea, fighting to make a new dream come true.

Epilogue. In the Depths of Dispair

Before chaos arrived, I had a very specific list of how my life would unfold. At seventeen, I mapped it out:

First, I would marry the cute boy from church, the one I’d had a crush on since I was six.
Second, I’d study Biotechnology—not because I was passionate about it, but simply to have a degree to show in the home I would share with my husband.

Option B? Finish my degree, pursue a master’s abroad, and dramatically say goodbye to everyone at church—especially my crush—on his wedding day, just like a scene from a romcom.

You may have guessed that none of this happened as planned. Although I was accepted to study Biotechnology at university, my crush never returned my feelings. I never told him how I felt, believing—like any good Christian girl—that I had to wait for him to make the first move. By the time he married at twenty-one, my dramatic goodbye scene never played out. Instead, after a year of tears, I had to move on.

Years later, I failed a subject twice and had to let go of my Biotechnology career. This setback led me to reconnect with an old passion I’d abandoned: photography. However, pursuing art in South America wasn’t an easy path. In a culture where artists were often seen as lazy and bohemian, associated with drugs and a lack of job opportunities, it felt like an impossible dream.

The cherry on top was that, at the time I had to switch careers, I also had to confront drastic changes. Suddenly, I was stepping out of my science bubble and seeing the real world in its true colors. On top of that, I faced complicated family issues. I had always lived for my family, doing everything I could to please them, especially after my dad passed away. I didn’t want to cause more trouble, but when I realized that some things no longer aligned with my values, it became hard for them to accept my perspective.

As my depression worsened, these career changes—since I saw myself as a failure—combined with family struggles and financial problems, only deepened my despair. My life felt like it was slowly extinguishing.

Is this how everything has to end?

Chapter 1. Like a Light in the End of the Tunel

There are angels that God puts in your path, disguised as friends and mentors. For me, during that difficult time, my support came in the form of my best friend. She told me about opportunities in Korea to study Biotechnology with scholarships.

To be honest, although I loved science and Biotechnology was still something I’d like to pursue in the future, my heart was more drawn to film. I was already working in that field, so it felt like the right time to follow my forgotten passion.

Traveling to Korea became a precious dream—one that motivated me to study the language and, for a brief time, allowed me to forget the chaos in my life. I felt alive again, just because of this dream. I applied for scholarships, but it wasn’t until two years later that I succeeded and was finally able to come to Korea.

“Father, you know I don’t know what will happen to me if I stay here… But you know I can’t be here anymore. Please, take me there”

Chapter 2. Living the Dream!

I started from zero. A clean slate.

When I arrived in Korea, everything was new—my environment, my language, my dreams. It felt like a fresh beginning, a chance to rebuild and redefine myself. Every small victory, every new word I learned in Korean, felt like a step toward the person I was becoming.

Here, I faced my depression and learned how to cope with it. I also met people from different countries—an enriching experience that opened my eyes and made me appreciate the world’s diversity.

Along the way, I had meaningful encounters and some loves that felt like scenes from a movie—memories I now protect in my heart.

None of this growth would have been possible if I hadn’t come to South Korea. This is one of the reasons Korea means, and always will mean, the world to me.

Chapter 3. Fly, and Dream Again my Little Girl

Wow! Seven years passed by so fast!

Korea has taught me so much, and I will always be grateful. One thing I learned here is that most of the people I met were travelers. Over time, I grew tired of seeing people leave, and it made me realize that my dream had grown wings. It was never meant to stay here forever.

Although Korea has become more open to foreigners, there are still complications for workers and long-term residents. Companies are not fully open to foreign staff, visa processes remain complicated, and there’s still a closed mindset in some areas—especially when it comes to appreciating diversity and multiculturalism. Still, I met wonderful people. Ajummas who treated me like their own daughter, offering me free food and comfort during difficult times, friends who made me feel welcomed and taught me about Korean culture, and people who saw me as more than just a random foreigner walking the streets of Seoul.

For these reasons, and because I haven’t explored other countries as much as I’d like, my heart decided that I had learned everything I needed to here. Thank you, Korea, for all you’ve given me, but now it’s time for me to go.

Good bye, home…

Chapter 4. What’s next?

I got fired three weeks ago…
To be honest, I feel like a failure all over again.

My plan was to return home, but the truth is, I don’t have a home to go back to anymore.

It feels like I’m right back in the eye of the storm.

But I would like to believe that this had to happen for me to move toward my new dream of emigrating again.

To be honest, I’m not the most religious person. But I will leave it to the Universe, God, or whatever force is out there, to guide me where I need to go.

“Lord, I do not know where you want to take me now. I am tired of fighting. Please take me where I need to start again. Amen.”

I send love to all those who are going through tough times in their lives. I’m not the most positive person, and I don’t want to say something like, “Everything is fine,” because we don’t know what will happen in life. I just want to tell you that I hope you feel hugged and loved. The only thing we can do is hope for the best and keep going, even when it feels like everything is falling apart. Maybe those winds from the storm will guide us to where we need to be, and to the people with whom we are meant to spend the rest of our time.

Wishing you the best,

With love,

Noe.